14 days

My history includes delivering anywhere from 2 weeks early to 11 days late. I just entered the "could-deliver-anytime-phase". Unfortunately for me, this phase could last for a while. I would be so pleased to deliver earlier rather than later. Fortunately, I have a wonderful midwife, whom I love dearly, who wouldn't even consider jump starting labor for me. So, there's no hope of an early delivery unless my body and baby together decide that they've had enough of this.

This summer has been insanely busy for our family. I felt like I had very little time to sit around dreaming sweet baby dreams, considering names, stock piling baby treasures or worrying about all the 'what if's'. This pregnancy has simply gone by almost in the blink of an eye.

The one and only thing that I did do that turned my mind and hands toward my baby during this pregnancy was that I revived an old love for crocheting. My mom taught me to crochet and knit back when I was probably 10 years old. I remember loving the feel of the yarn in my hands. I remember being so proud of the tacky projects that I completed. But as a teen, my time and energy got swallowed up in youth group, volley ball, school and more socializing. I laid the yarn and needles down and didn't pick them up again for at least 15 years.

This pregnancy awakened something in me and I got the urge to crochet again. I wanted to make something with my hands for this baby. So. I started browsing little hat patterns and looking at all the yarn choices. It didn't take long for me to become an addict. Crocheting become a survival mechanism in the craziness of the past couple of months. I would unwind, late at night, with the yarn and needle. I would stop my other brain processing and think about the little person growing inside.

I've made numerous hats but these are two of my favorites. The striped one is all ready to slip on a robust little man's head and the soft green one with the white flower is ready just in case we happen to be blessed with a tiny little lady of a baby.

Yeah, we still do it the old fashion way....we do not know the sex of our baby. We've waited with all our babies to find out the sex at birth. It's been a really fun part of our experience and so it's hard for us to imagine anything different.

I look at my girly clothes and think about how much I would love to be mommy to another little girl. My girl stash only got used once and that was 9 years ago. Just looking and tenderly touching those delicate pink pieces brings back a rush of memories from when my first and only daughter introduced me to motherhood. Ahhhhh....

 Then I pick up a piece of boy clothing and my heart melts at the thought of another little boy joining our ranks. We could have our own basket ball team. Think of the mountains my guys could climb, the houses they could build, the rivers they could forge. 4 boys. Wow. I wouldn't have to mow the grass again for years.

So. 14 more days until due date. My mind is now swirling with lots of baby thoughts. I'm waiting. I'm anxious. I can't wait to meet this new little person with whom I'm already head over heels in love with.

 I'm recalling the days of sharing pregnancy with this fun bunch of friends in 2010:

It's a bit more lonely this time.

And when I feel like yelling at one of my tribe because they're getting too dirty or making the house dirty or fighting or just getting on my nerves...I try to remember that one day, not that long ago....I was waiting with the same kind of passion to meet each of them.

9 years ago.......it was Angeline Renae

3 years ago it Christopher Melvin

5 and half years ago it was this little sweet stinker who I call Joshua Myron

7 years ago Nicholas Hans filled my arms with all his sweetness

And today, I wait. I hope. I dream. And I use 3 bed pillows plus a body pillow to make it through the night.